A medical emergency

[fadingworld]

A deep navy cloak hides his features and the more ornate tunic the courtesan usually wears to greet his clients. Mal hunches his shoulders and slides through the crowds hoping to avoid notice. He keeps his head down until he reaches the home of the doctor and wraps smartly on the door. "Open up," he calls in a voice that expects to be listened to.

How much time did he have? He could not have a client bleeding out. Not this one. Not one who had come to him for help, to be treated privately.

Comments

[mandragoraspiritus]

That is a serious topic indeed, one Regis wants to give his full attention. He leaved the pot of soup puttering on the stove, turning to face Mal.

"Though many a mother would hate me for such a choice, I would save the mother if such a choice became unavoidable. A motherless infant will have a very hard start in life and will not always be cared for as it should. A mother who has lost a child will grieve, but to risk sounding crass, in time there might be other children to fill her heart."

[fadingworld]

Mal looks thoughtful, "That was what I would have thought. It sounds awful laid out so barely. But it is true." There would be more than one awful decision to make with this choice of job.

"You have been alive for so long. Are you having to make the decision less than you did one hundred years ago?"

[mandragoraspiritus]

He shakes his head somewhat sadly. "No. There have been too many recent wars, leaving many people in poorer conditions. Especially so in the countryside it is in the countryside I have spent most of my time. City life makes it so much harder to avoid detection as a vampire. No, childbirth sadly remains an all too common cause of death for both mother and child."

[fadingworld]

I would like to fix that, Mal thinks. There is a little-determined set to his chin. No life should be wasted if possible. "It's unfair," he says. "I know nothing can be perfect. That everyone will have struggles and sorrow, but there are things that can be fixed!"

[mandragoraspiritus]

"They can and it shoudl be our responsibility to strive for that. However..." He sits down at teh table opposite of Mal, resting his forearms on the surface, his fingers lightly laced together. The soup can putter along a while longer.

"You will lose patients, Mal. If you take this road then there will be people who will die no matter how hard you try to save them. That is something you will need to be able to live with."

[fadingworld]

Mal looks sad for a moment. "But...if more than a handful of people die the same way....shouldn't you be mad? Shouldn't it be possible to improve things after you've seen it a few times?"

[mandragoraspiritus]

"You might think so but that isn't always the case. It is rarely the case. An injury, yes, maybe. And perhaps a handful might be enough to recognize a sickness, but knowing what it is isn't enough to know how to treat it. Sometimes an illness can strike so hard and fast you might not have the time to even begin to figure out the cause but rather only to treat the symptoms."

He looks seriously at Mal but not unkindly. "But yes, of course I am mad when such things happen. I might curse the very sky itself, for all the good it does me. But fact of the matter is that it does still happen. There might even be times when I know that I am doing everything right but I lose the patient anyway."

[fadingworld]

Mal looks down at the table. "It's stupid. We should be able to help them all," he mutters. "If I can help clients with their problems why can't I save everyone."

He looks up sadly. "I don't want to kill people."

[mandragoraspiritus]

"People may die but you are not the one to kill them. Losing a patient does not make you a murderer." The difference is so huge it should not need saying, and yet it does.

"And you can't save everyone because you are not a God, and problems of the mind are not problems of the body, serious as they can be sometimes. Mal, I have practiced medicine for two whole centuries by now and even I cannot save everyone."

[fadingworld]

Mal blows out a sigh, he is going to try to save everyone. "I understand." It doesn't mean that he has to like it. Or accept it. "Is this the hardest part of the job, letting people die?"

[mandragoraspiritus]

"Again, Mal, it isn't letting anyone die. It is them dying despite all we do to help." Mal has to learn that difference, or he won't be able to handle it. Still, no matter the first one will be difficult. "But, yes, it is the hardest part. Without a doubt."

[fadingworld]

Mal looks stubborn. "I only want to see them die of old age. I have to make a difference." He sighs. "Do you know anyone who has never lost a patient?"

[mandragoraspiritus]

"You will make a difference. But that isn't the same as saving everyone and losing no-one. Again, Mal, you are not a God." He sighs, shaking his head. "No, I do not know anyone who has never lost a patient. I do not thing any such doctor exists."

[fadingworld]

Mal glares at the table. "It isn't fair!" he exclaims with his shoulders hunched. "It just isn't..." He clenches his fists at his side. "I don't want to kill people."

[mandragoraspiritus]

"Mal..." Regis rises from his seat and goes around the table. Going down to one knee he resolutely takes Mal's head between his hands, turning his face towards him to force him to look at him.

"If you become a man of healing and set out there to help people, then the absolute majority of the people you help will be aided by you and go on to live their lives, perhaps because you help them. You will save far more than you lose. Even those you do lose will not have died at your hands. Trust me that I know the difference and you must understand it. If you don't then this profession will kill you."

[fadingworld]

Mal leans into those clever fingers. It might kill him....but it would be worth it. "Being a courtesan was almost easier," he whispers. "I could take their pain away for awhile. I just...want to help."

[mandragoraspiritus]

"And you will help. But you must know your limitations." Regis stays like that, keeping Mal there, keeping their gazes locked.

"Should we always strive to do our best? To find new cures, develop new treatments, new ways to deal with injuries and sickness? Yes. A million times yes. But we will not always succeed."

[fadingworld]

"Wh can't we," Mal whispers. The intense gaze from the other draws emotions to the surface. He looks genuinely upset. "I can understand old age but...why one survive a fever and not another. It isn't fair." He sighs heavily, "I guess..." and here he is thinking of the correct responses, "I will learn to take it."

[mandragoraspiritus]

During those talk Regis has started to have some serious doubts whether Mal is suited for this but that last response eases those doubts just enough that he's willing to continue forward.

"It isn't just about us," he says, slowly releasing Mal and standing back up. "Or about what we do. It is about everything else as well. The conditions they live in, the food on their table, the water in their well, or simply how they are born. There are so many things beyond our control. As I said about the young lady awaiting her first child. Some women will handle a pregnancy without issue, others will not."

[fadingworld]

"I had not thought about the outside factors," Mal says slowly. This is something he would need to read up on. "Have you books on that? To understand."

[mandragoraspiritus]

"I do, Regis says, now turning to fetch the soup from the stove and put it on the table. "But you cannot study everything at once. You must start with the basics."

[fadingworld]

Mal smiles, “I do have patience, I promise. I want to know everything. However I do understand that a rushed job produces some very unelegant results.”

[mandragoraspiritus]

"Indeed. And as from our discussion, that we simply cannot afford."

He takes his seat and helps himself of the food. "What I propose is this. The subject of the human body is a vast one, but only theoretical studies will not get you far. So parallel to those studies I will also teach you practical matters. We will start with first aid and emergency treating of wounds and move on from there."

[fadingworld]

Mal spoons the soup up his appetite much revived now. "Thank you," he says softly. "I know it will take much of your time up. I will make sure it is worth your while."

[mandragoraspiritus]

"Yes, I'm rather counting on that," Regis says simply and kindly. He's sure that Mal will do his best.


Things start to settle into something of a routine for them over the coming couple of weeks, with studies both practical and theoretical. Mal does well in both, but one evening when Regis for the third time fishes a long strand of dark hair from the pile of dried herbs they are working on turning into powders that the vampire can no longer keep from commenting.

"It isn't that I do not appreciate the appearance of your hair, Mal, but have you never thought of more practical ways of wearing it?"